America's favorite thyroid humorist Jody LaFerriere has decided to "weigh in" on the issue of Oprah Winfrey's thyroid and weight challenges, and has graciously shared her letter to Oprah with us here at the About.com Thyroid site! Dear Oprah,
Maybe you just got a little fuzzy-brained when you decided to try to treat your thyroid condition with rest and soy milk in Hawaii. I know it's happened to me in the past, like the time I got confused and thought I could drink 8 glasses of eggnog a day instead of 8 glasses of water a day. Sure, Hawaii is pretty and relaxing and the perfect place to drop in a chair and stare at the sunset, but it's like eggnog…it's the caloric equivalent of a cup of sugar added to mayonnaise; it tastes good, but it's not good for you, and it's certainly not going to help you lose weight.
For the record, I am not thin. You and I could share clothes if you chose to ditch the designer outfits for some no-iron pants and baggy sweaters. I don't currently own any pantyhose, so you'll have to pony up some of those as well, if we are to have a successful closet swap. Also, I am going to need some shoes. I take a size 10. You look like you have big feet so that should work out well.
But here's the thing; I take my medication, and I think that's the only thing keeping me from needing to buy a whole new wardrobe every six months. Or to prevent me from being featured in a news story about someone who hasn't gotten out of bed for four years. I take my medication because that's what it is…medication meant to treat a disease.
Perhaps that's part of the problem – you don't know you have a disease. I find it hard to believe a smart lady like you would not take it seriously if presented in that way. Unless you also believe that you don't need to treat things like kidney disease, gum disease, or mental illness?
Hawaii would do my mental state a good turn, but not if my problems are caused by a chemical imbalance. Soy milk isn't going to cure cancer. Root beer might, but not soy milk, because, c'mon, isn't it obvious?
You have said that you think you're 200 pounds in part because of "energy blockages in the throat region." I think it may be because of rational thought blockages in the brain region. I know I have energy blockages in the legs region, which is what keeps me from exercising, which is what keeps me from losing some of this weight. Never mind, maybe you're on to something with this energy blockage thing!
It's always way more fun to come up with convoluted and controversial theories for things, especially when you have your own television show. I personally blame People magazine for the fact that I have more grey hair now than I did ten years ago. There has to be some connection, because ten years ago, when I started reading People, I had significantly less gray hair than I do now.
I should go on television to talk about this. If your people are paying attention, I am available to come on your show any time you want. I can even arrange to spit out a book on the topic between now and whenever it is you can squeeze me in. Now excuse me while I go to the grocery store for eggnog, root beer and a People magazine.
-- Jody
Read more thyroid-related ruminations from Jody LaFerriere:
- I'm a New Me
- A Letter To My Pal Santa
- Not Available in Any Store: Hypothyroid Barbie
- Put Some Gravy On That / Thanksgiving Ruminations of a New Thyroid Patient
Photo: Paul Hawthorne, Getty Images
Oprah is doind a great disservice to her viewers by not admitting she has hypothyroidism or whatever she does have thyroid wise. People can and do admit to being alcoholics, meth amphetamine addicts, sex addicts and she can’t admit to that? WHat’s the problem? The stigma? Please, she’s told the world about her life, this isn’t going to make anyone dislike her.
thanks for the laugh
Love it! Poor, poor Oprah. How ill will she have to become before she finally sees the light?
Christina – Hashimoto since 1970 and never missed a pill.
Perhaps Oprah should have her adrenal glands checked. She is lucky, if her only issue is Thyroid, then she does not need to weigh 200 pounds, try haveing Addison’s Disease and having to take Steroids for life, Steroids make you gain weight, it is not your choice about weather or not to have cheese on that burger and save a few calories, it is a choice of acceptance, I have researched and reseached and have found no help in losing the 40 pounds I gained after starting Prednisone, I am hoping Neutra System would be willing to do a trial with me on their new Glycemic Index food and if I loose weight on it, I know hundreds of Primary like me and secondary Addison’s Disease person’s who would jump all over this food. But at any rate perhaps Oprah has adrenal disease, maybe not to the extent that I do, but Adrenals and thyroid seem to go hand in hand. Suggest it to her to have it checked, a simple blood test of her ATCH will answer all her questions about that. Good luck Oprah, I just think you should stop useing the thyroid as a reason for gaining this much weight, it is under control, so now it is time to start realizing that you will never be skinny and get on with a happy life!